Chapter 24
The train had finally arrived at its destination. It
slid its way between a few fences of black and white stripes, and then it
stopped at a station similar to that of the one Mt. Rugged had. Xoshi and White
Rose hopped off it, were given regards by the two little Toads running the
vehicle, and they could continue their journey on foot.
While letting his rubber shoes take turns landing in
different places against the white pavement of the town's ground, Xoshi
couldn't help but notice as he walked along that this place was much greener in
contrast to that of the yellow desert they had finally exited. The decrease in
temperature this place took on was also a huge relief to Xoshi. At last, he
could be surrounded by cool, refreshing air and kind people that came in
various rainbow colors, not unlike the Yoshies of his homeland that this place
faintly reminded him of. Toads of small and smaller sizes were what they walked
between on their way to their big destination. Such a place was exactly what
Xoshi had in mind. He talked to Beel some about it, and let his mouth do the
rest.
"Um," he stammered. White Rose looked at him.
"Shooting Star Summit... here... right?"
White Rose nodded. "Yes, Sir Xoshi. It's here. It's
a bit of a walk from here to there, though," he cautioned.
"Okay," Xoshi said. Expecting yet more delays,
and probably also accepting them, the brown Yoshi shut his mouth and continued
trudging along with the desert-themed knight beside him...
♠♣♥♦
Nap time was
over. Therefore, Shy Guy, Snifit, Chak, and David decided it was time to wake
up, leave their peaceful area, and head on through the woods of Kariboo Island.
Upon embarking on this little hike of theirs, a question or two had to start
emanating from what Snifit called a mouth.
"Hey, Shy Guy," he asked the gigantic brute,
"what do you know about Kariboo Island, anyway?" he asked.
"Well," said the muscle man, "I know it's
where Goombas are native to."
"So we might see some Goombas here?" Snifit
guessed.
"Heh, you'll see a lot of 'em," Shy Guy said
back.
"I heard they weren't liked much," said Chak.
"That's only because there are too many negative
stereotypes of them," David informed. "Stereotypes are not to
entirely be trusted ever."
"So," Snifit evoked, "we'll be seeing
some nice ones?"
"Yeah, they're pretty nice, I guess," Shy Guy
responded. "But, hey, don't take my word for it..." At that moment,
the quartet was at last out of another collection of rough shrubbery and
vegetation and into one more vast opening. "See for yourself!" Shy
Guy responded once they were in such a new location. This one consisted of a
fair-sized village composed of strange buildings coming in rectangular shapes
with somewhat trapezoidal roofs and circular windows. Their inhabitants, the
supposedly good-natured Goombas, were walking around here and there. They
mostly came in brown, just as their houses did. However, one of these buildings
was grey, more fortress-like, and particularly bigger than the others, and the
Goombas, themselves, were sulking everywhere, dragging their feet wherever they
went. They had blank, emotionless expressions on their faces. The four
travelers observed this new place with intrigue and a little concern. They
emerged from the island's batch of trees and went on walking until they reached
a sign that read, "Welcome to Goomba Grove." A brown Goomba with an
uninspired look appeared from behind it and shuffled to a place in front of the
group.
"Greeeetings, travelers," the Goomba said with
about as much enthusiasm as a rusty doornail. "Weeeelcome to Goooomba
Groooove."
"That's what the sign says!" Shy Guy pointed
out. Snifit gave him another weird look. The grey guy took his gaze off the
beefy one and took another moment to observe this Goomba. He didn't seem to be
acting any different from all the other mope-oholics in the village. Some of
them were just meandering down the streets slowly as though there were
invisible metal balls shackled to their ankles, the littler ones were very
hesitantly and tiredly playing hopscotch, and the elderly ones were on their
porch-swings being more sluggish than usual. Chak and David exchanged worried
glances. Snifit returned his eyes to his muscular companion.
"So these are the so called nice Goombas you were
tellin' us about?" he asked.
Shy Guy shrugged his big shoulders. "What's up with
you guys?" he said to the Goomba before them. "You're not as cheery
as you were the last time I was here."
"The Goooomba Kiiiing," the Goomba started.
"He repealed some laaaaws. Now everyday at noooon, we don't get to see
funny shows anymoooore..." he explained in a mournful tone.
Chak looked at Shy Guy. "Shows?" he inquired.
"Yeah," the giant said. "Each day, these
people gather in the middle of town to see some shows get put on by comedians,
and magicians, and whatnot. That's what kept 'em going, I guess."
"But they don't have those anymore, and now you're
all sad?" David spoke to the Goomba.
"We still have shoooows," he corrected.
"They're just no fun anymoooore."
"Ah, so that's why you're like this," Snifit
guessed.
"Noooope," the Goomba said, while shaking his
head in slow-motion. "I'm allllways like thiiiis." Snifit placed a
hand over his eyes, Shy Guy kept his huge arms folded, David blinked in
disbelief, and Chak scratched the side of his deformed face. "I hoooope
you enjooooy your staaaay..." the Goomba worded. He then began to shuffle
his way back to where he came from until he was once again an unseen person
hiding behind the welcoming sign. The group stood in silence, which
complemented the mood of the town in a way. Then Shy Guy unfolded his arms,
smacked a powerful fist into a palm, and started talking again.
"Idea," he declared. The other three looked at
him in wonder. "We go to that big grey building over there," he
pointed to that very architecture in the distance, "and we complain about
this. Once we do, the Goomba King will admit he was wrong, and this village
will return to normal! Come on, what do ya say?"
Snifit gave him a befuddled look. "Why do we have
to do that?" he asked.
"We don't have to," David chirped. "It
would just slow us down. I'd like to be an adult again as soon as possible, if
you don't mind. Besides: this isn't our problem, anyway."
"True, but if WE won't do it, who will?" Chak
said.
"That's right!" Shy Guy agreed. "These
people need our help! They're countin' on us to bring back their
funniness!"
"No, they're not," Snifit argued, his head
shaking with his arms folded.
"Come on, guys," Shy Guy urged. "It's
just a little bump in the road! We'll get through it! It won't even take that
long. We go see the king, talk to him, return everything to normal, everybody's
happy, and we move on. That's all there is to it! It's not like that treasure's
going anywhere, anyway."
"Well, maybe, but..." Snifit said.
"Come on!!" Shy Guy urged, his fin-like hands
curling into things resembling fists in front of him and jiggling as his
eagerness continued. Chak looked at David who had an unsure facial expression
and was scratching the back of his head.
"Fine, fine. Let's just get this overwith,"
Snifit conceded.
"Alright!" Shy Guy cheered.
David spoke up. "Well... I suppose it wouldn't hurt
too much."
"YES!" Chak said.
Shy Guy rubbed his hands together, enthusiastically.
"Then it's settled! We're going to see the Goomba King! Come on. Let's
go!" He pumped his arms and got the march going again. Chak was the first
to start following. Snifit and David stayed behind for a few seconds to
exchange unsure glances. Then they started to walk after their humungous leader
as well.
♠♣♥♦
Raphael stood in the very same area he did when he
promised to all the Yoshies of Lava Lava Island that he would win their home
back from his corruptive brother. He fulfilled that promise, and so the
occasion just happened to be a rather special one. He stood there with the new
guy and the cowardly guy, Yoshi and Fyooshi, right behind him. That one dark
orange Yoshi that the easily-frightened one took note of earlier was there,
too. The four of them waited patiently for the moment to ensue. A
periwinkle-colored Yoshi approached the heroic fowl with a black one and a
white one behind him who were similarly being followed by a maroon one, a
goldenrod one, a cerulean one, and a lime-colored one. They arranged themselves
neatly before the new ruler, bowed, and did as they planned.
"Raphael," said the one up front, "we
sincerely thank you for all that you've done for us. Words cannot express the
joy you've brought unto us, the citizens of Lava Lava Island. Therefore, we
have taken the liberty of preparing for you a symbol of our gratitude..."
"Please," Raphael said. The Yoshi that just
spoke to him looked a bit surprised. "There's no need to be so formal.
This is Lava Lava Island, the tropical paradise! Let's just relax. I need to
loosen up, anyway." The oversized bird ruffled his feathers and gave his
head a quick shake. Still a little bewildered, that certain Yoshi stalled and
blinked a bit, then continued talking.
"Yes, well..." He cleared his throat.
"Anyway, we're really grateful, so we'd like you to have this." He stepped
back and let Ren's duo of former-fanners walk forward. They were holding a
nicely detailed little statue of their savior. It was a very good-looking
little object, complete with all the shines and smoothness one could ever ask
for. The thing was made of a certain hard material that was very pretty and
teal all over. Surely the Raven would have enjoyed this. Yoshi, Fyooshi, and
the other guy were definitely impressed. Raphael seemed to be gazing at it in
an equal amount of admiration. The periwinkle one went on. "We worked all
night making this for you, Raphael. We hope you like it."
Raphael looked at the reward, then at the Yoshi offering
it, and then at the others behind him that were all smiling approvingly. He
smiled back, looked ahead of himself, and responded at last. "I'm
flattered," he said. "I really am. But..." The Yoshies, both in
front of him and behind him suddenly started looking at him with concerned
faces. "But... Really, I got the island back for you so you wouldn't have
to make statues anymore. I mean..." The group of Yoshies that were
offering this to him were beginning to droop in disappointment. Raphael
searched for the right words. "I appreciate the gesture," he said,
"but I'm afraid I can't accept this. I'd be no different from my
brother."
The periwinkle Yoshi fidgeted with his hands. Then he
said, "So... Should we just... get rid of it, then?"
Raphael shrugged. "Do with it what you will. Just
please... Don't make anymore of them, even if your leader goes insane and
forces you to." He got a few laughs from his visitors by saying that. The
periwinkle one scratched the back of his head and walked around the two
Yo'sters that were holding the statue. He took it from them in spite of its
heaviness.
The Yoshi turned around and said, "Alright then,
Raphael." He then walked past him and up to Fyooshi. The magenta-colored
scaredy-cat looked shocked. The other two Yoshies looked confused. "Here
you go, Fyooshi," said the guy that just approached him. "Why don't you
have this? I guess you deserve it anyway. I mean, if it weren't for you,
Raphael wouldn't have been able to come back, right?"
Fyooshi was speechless. He nervously let his hands
massage one another as his eyes switched back and forth between looking at his
new prize and the person offering it to him. "Um, sure. I guess so,"
he agreed.
"Good," said the other Yoshi. He held the
statue out even further and Fyooshi extended his arms. The reward got lowered
into his appendiges which sagged a bit as a result of the weight. He grunted
slightly as the periwinkle Yoshi went back to being in front of Raphael. The
black and white Yoshies had stepped back to allow this. "Well, Raphael, we
just wanted to thank you for saving us. And don't worry, we'll take your
advice. We won't build anymore statues, even if we have to." He and his
followers bowed to the hero after that. "Anyway," he said, "you
take it easy. I guess we all should, huh?" Raphael nodded. "Well...
We'll be seeing you!" Finally, the clique waved to the big, feathery man,
turned around, and walked away from the scene. Raphael smirked in satisfaction.
He turned himself around to address his three companions.
"Well, everyone," he said, "it's been
long enough. I'd better be heading back to the tree. And Fyooshi," he said
to the statue-holding guy, "thank you. Thank you for sticking with me to
the end."
Fyooshi blushed. "Ah, it was nothing," he
said, modestly.
"Watch over the village while I'm gone,"
Raphael said. "And if you ever need me... just give me a call...
Okay?"
"Sure thing," Fyooshi nodded.
"Alright. Over and out!" said the enormous
Raven. He nodded to the Yo'ster trio, and they let him pass. At last, he
shuffled his way out of the vicinity and back into the jungle. The three-some
watched him disappear slowly into the ornery obstacle course of greenery. After
letting his departure sink in, Fyooshi turned around and looked at Yoshi. The
other dark orange attendant walked up beside the statue-holder. Yoshi was
muddled.
"Anyway," Fyooshi said, "this is my
friend, Glishy. We've known eachother for a long time now. He's gonna help you
figure out what the heck we're all saying!"
Yoshi didn't understand a word of that, but then the
dark orange Yoshi started saying something. "He just introduced me,"
he said. Yoshi's eyes popped wide open. He wondered if he had gone crazy.
"You speak Yoshish?!" he asked. The new
interpreter nodded.
"It's one of the languages I know," he said.
He made a movement with his hand. "Come on," he requested to the
green Yo'ster. "I'll show you what I mean." Glishy started walking
off in one direction. Shortly afterwards, Yoshi began his pursuit. Fyooshi
called to his old friend.
"Good luck, Glishy!" he said. "I'll just
find a place to put this, alright?" He bobbed his newfound statue up and
down with his arms. Glishy just waved to him. Not too long after that, Fyooshi
got going as well. He walked in what was pretty much the opposite direction of
where the other two had went, leaving the area that was previously occupied by
so many people to be left all alone. Still, scattered throughout the village,
the Yoshies wandered about, minding their own businesses and worrying over
nothing that could ruin their day. Lava Lava Island began its first day of
peace...
♠♣♥♦
Down the road,
the four of Shy Guy, Snifit, Chak, and David wandered. Beside them and all
around them were more strange houses and people that were dangerously low on
motivation. Snifit had to ask another question. "Hey, Shy Guy," he
asked, "what exactly do you suppose these new shows they put on are
like?"
DONG! DONG! DONG! DONG! A huge bell started ringing. All
the civilians of the village stopped what they were doing, left their houses,
left their yards, and started walking in one direction. It seemed to be a
little to the left of where the group was headed. "Let's find out!"
Shy Guy insisted. Chak nodded at this proposal, but once again, Snifit and
David weren't too sure about this. Soon enough, they were back to following
their two partymembers.
In time, a nice crowd of little brown Goombas had made
it to their big gathering place: a big square-shaped patch of grass with a
wooden stage built in the middle of it all. The red curtains were still
covering it up and the bell was still sounding. After making it between more
homes and down more roads, the courageous four-some had finally joined with the
rest of the people. Unfortunately, they were way in the back so their view was
a bit obscured. Shy Guy, being the supremely tall one, had no trouble with
this, of course. With his arms folded, he could see perfectly well that the
curtains were beginning to be pulled back once the bell stopped ringing.
"Yyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay..." the Goombas groaned.
"What?" David asked. "What's going on? I
can't see a damn thing!!" he complained.
"That's some pretty rough language for such a
little boy, Davey," Shy Guy commented.
"Quiet, you," David demanded. He started
hopping up and down, only catching glimpses of what was to be seen by doing so.
"Here, lemme help you," Shy Guy said. He
unfolded his masculine arms and used his right one to reach over to the boy and
grab a hold of the back of his collar. Effortlessly, he lifted the child up
into the air. His arms and his legs were flailing, furiously.
"Hey! Put me down!!" he protested. Shy Guy
ignored the order and set him down so he'd have a seat behind the back of his
neck in a position that had his short legs hanging past either side of the big
man's head. Shy Guy got a hold of those legs with each hand. "What is the
meaning of this?!" he argued.
"You can see now, can't you?" Shy Guy said.
Indeed, he could. The crowd was still mumbling as a Goomba in a black tuxedo
walked onto the middle of the stage. All of this could be seen above the Shy
Guy's cranium thanks to his service.
"Hmph," David grumbled. He watched the spiffy-looking
Goomba stop in the middle of the stage and face the audience.
It's bad enough I look like a child, David
thought. I don't have to be treated like one, too.
"Ladies and gentlemen," said the Goomba to the
viewers. "Today, we shall show you a tale of good battling evil. A tale of
the hard-core struggles that were faced in order to form these lands and the
founding fathers that fought for it all."
"Oh, brother. Another history lesson," Chak
heard a bored Goomba mutter.
"Ladies and gentlemen," the main speaker said,
"Presenting... The Tale of the Shy War!" He took a bow and walked off
the stage. The audience let loose another moan of a not very excited cheer, and
the show began. Four Goombas walked on. They were each clad in red robes and
their faces were hidden by masks very much like the one Shy Guy had, except one
of them had a big white mustache.
"Look, Snifit! It's us!" Shy Guy said
excitedly.
"Great," Snifit mumbled. "They're gonna
make us look like idiots. I know it."
A disembodied voice with a very bored tone to it started
telling the audience what exactly was going on. "It all began with the
formation of a certain cult... or something like that..." the narrator
said.
"Actually, that's about right," Snifit said
quietly. The show continued. The Goombas dressed like 8-Bits started acting
like they were talking to eachother. The narrator continued discussing this.
"They called themselves the Shy Gang," the
voice said. The four Goombas did a dramatic pose. "They decided if they
could bring the female monster, Tondariya, back from the dead, they could take
over the world and do whatever they liked."
"That's totally not right," Snifit pointed
out.
The Goombas pretending to be 8-Bits nodded to eachother
and walked off the stage. Then four more walked on, but these ones weren't
dressed in anything. They had beady eyes painted on their white stomachs and
their faces were red with white spots. "Once the Super Mushroom League
heard of this, they decided to take action." The four Goombas representing
the Super Mushroom League nodded to eachother and walked a little more. Then
the four Shy Gang Goombas walked back from where they disappeared. The two
groups spotted eachother and started acting like they were fighting. They did
it very uncaringly. The Goombas would just hop back and forth. Whenever one of
the Shy Gang ones would do so much as even just nick one of the Super Mushroom
League ones, they would plop down onto the stage's floor and remain motionless
as well as emotionless. Soon, all four members of the Super Mushroom League
were down. The Shy Gang left. "However, overcoming the Shy Gang was a
completely different matter." The downed Goombas got back up, pretended to
talk some more, nodded, and walked off-stage. Then the montage began. They would
walk back on along with a few other Goombas in dumb costumes whenever the
narrator would introduce some new tidbit of information. "They had to team
up with a magical Yoshi... A strange Raven with a unibrow... An 8-Bit with
ice-elemental powers... An 8-Bit wearing a black robe... A Sackit with a
grouchy disposition... And even a Koopa and the famous heavy metal band, the
Demonic Jesters..."
"What the- They didn't team up with them!!"
Snifit objected.
"Snifit, hush!" Shy Guy said.
"But they're getting it all wrong! It was way more
complicated than that!"
"HUSH!"
The narrator continued. With a beefed-up army, the Super
Mushroom League walked up to the Shy Gang, but their numbers seemed to be just
as prodigious. "Then, at last, the final battle ensued." The two
groups went at it, but it was basically just a repeat of the fight scene that
the actors failed to portray earlier. Audience members were beginning to lose
consciousness. "When all hope was nearly lost, this big, great angel
showed up and invited everyone to a tea party... The Mushroom Tea
Party..." A Goomba with angel wings and a halo showed up to demonstrate
what the narrator was talking about.
"What in the name of Bonus Games?" Snifit
grumbled.
"At the tea party, the two groups finally got to discuss
their differences and sign a treaty. Then they had a toast and peace was
restored to the lands. And that was about it. The End... I guess..." The
curtain closed on the tea party scene. Noone applauded. They were all too busy
sleeping. The only sound of clapping was coming from the way back.
"I knew they'd make us look like idiots,"
Snifit muttered.
"Well, that was a waste of- WHOA!!" David fell
off Shy Guy's back. The muscle man let go of his legs so he could start the
loud action of slapping his hands together.
"WHOO-HOO!! BRAVO! BRAVO! ENCORE! ENCORE!!" he
cheered. He even started making whistling sounds by injecting his hands into
that hole in his mask. WHUMP. The sound of Shy Guy's obnoxious praisings was
beginning to wake the crowd up, but the sound of David hitting the ground woke
Chak up.
"Hm? What was that? Has the show started yet?"
the mutated man asked. Snifit was busy helping David back onto his feet.
"You alright, David?" the 8-Bit asked.
"Yes, I'm quite fine, thank you." Once David
was standing again, he swept some dust off himself, and said, "Shy Guy,
you'd make a terrible father." Hearing this, the big man turned around
while various Goombas behind him were beginning to pack their things and go.
"Daddy, dat pway was boooh-wiiiing," they
heard one kid say.
"I know, Junior, I know," said the parent.
"No, I wouldn't!" Shy Guy defended. "I'd
be the best dad ever! My son would crawl up onto my lap each night, and he'd
say, 'Daddy, tell me a stowy.'
"And I'd be like, 'Okay, son! Tonight, I shall tell
the story of-"
"-What REALLY happened!" Snifit fumed. He
looked at Chak and David. "Come on. We told you guys just the other night
what happened! They, like, only had about 50% of their facts straight!"
"Which is why you should never trust textbooks,
either," David commented.
"Never say never," Chak retorted.
"Well, what's it matter anyway, guys? We saw the
play, now let's go!" Shy Guy said. He started walking back in the
direction of the Goomba King's fortress. The others started walking as well.
"Indeed! We have yet to show that tyrant what's
good for him," Chak agreed.
"Yeah, and we'll have to give him a history lesson,
or two," Snifit griped.
"Noone should be forced to endure something that
boring," David said.
Shy Guy suddenly stopped in his tracks. He turned around
and looked at David with his overgrown arms spread out. "Boring?! Are you
out of your mind?! That was the greatest performance I've ever seen!!"
"Did THEY enjoy it??" David retaliated. He
gestured at the Goombas around them who had returned to sulking and walking
extra slowly. Some of them were even crawling on the ground using their faces
to wipe against it and their stubby feet to push themselves forward. Their
spirits had not been raised in the least by this uninteresting spectacle.
"Is that the kind of show you want these people to continue seeing? A
second ago, you were saying it wasn't," David pointed out.
"I-" Shy Guy raised a hand like a pointing
finger and was going to present his comeback, but the little kid had a good
point. He put his arm down and started rubbing the bottom of his mask.
"Hmmm..." he hummed. Then he shrugged his big shoulders.
"Well... I guess we could reach some kind of compromise," he
suggested.
"That's fine with me. Now let's go get that Goomba
King!" Chak insisted.
"Alright! And then we can see what we can do about
these shows!" Shy Guy declared.
"RIGHT!" his three companions said
simultaneously. Then the four of them started making a sprint for the fortress.
They were the most energetic people in the entire village...
♠♣♥♦
SHUNK! Seven...
Seven... Cherry. "Aww, darn it!!" Yazzee cursed.
He said he'd have liked it better had the last symbol
had been another seven rather than a cherry."
In spite of the slot machine's last symbol, Yazzee was
still on a roll. KCKHSQCHSHTT!! A bunch of coins spilled out of the device and
a crowd cheered. Piantas and Nokis had gathered to see the yellow Yo'ster
constantly break records. Beside him in the gambling center of that hotel he
entered, there was a pile of bags with his name on them. He was ahead, but not
quitting. He inserted another coin into the machine, took another tug at its
handle, and watched the wheels spin. This was the routine of Yazee and SPOWT,
and it wasn't ceasing...
♠♣♥♦
"The casino? Ah, yes, sir. It's right this
way."
"Good."
A Pianta in uniform stepped aside and let three floating
carrot people walk through the door that was behind him a second ago. Carro,
Boscis, and their ugly leader were finally at their destination...
♠♣♥♦
Seven... Seven...
Star. "Grrrr!!" Yazzee fumed. Regardless, SPOWT translated, coins
spilled out, and a crowd cheered. The entertainment of the day had no dull
moment in sight. Then the carrots walked in. Once they were at the end of the
aisle of velvet ropes, the leader noticed the gigantic room was circular. It
had two sets of slot machines, two tremendously oversized slot machines built
into the walls, two fountains, and something that was being covered by some red
curtains. In the center of it all was a humungous roullette wheel built into
the ground. To his left was the place with the slot machines and the people
going crazy.
"What's all the commotion?" the leader asked a
nearby Pianta that worked at the place.
"Some Yoshi over there is winning it big!"
said the portly empyloyee. "All he does is mumble gibberish, and he's
making history over there!"
"A Yoshi? Making history? On the contrary,"
the unattractive carrot man grumbled. "Step aside!!"
"Yes, sir!" The Pianta obeyed. The three
carrots floated over to where all the glory was being hogged. Once they reached
all the rambunctious people, the pushing, shoving, and demanding got going.
"Alright, people, let's move it. Go on, now. Make
way. Coming through!" the leader growled. The crowd members were a little
annoyed by this intrusion, but they complied anyway. At last, the leader and
Yazzee were side by side. Seven... Seven... Turnip.
"Blast it!!" Yazzee said.
"What the-" the carrot leader grumbled. It
seemed that one Pianta wasn't lying when he said this Yoshi only spoke
gibberish. The machine on its back started talking.
"He said he must try again."
"Oh, yeah? Well I say there's only room in Isle
Delfino for ONE slot machine champion, and it's NOT gonna be HIM!" The
crowd gasped at the leader's words. SPOWT turned its head around to translate
the carrot's words to Yazzee. The yellow Yoshi was about to insert another
coin, but then he turned around to look this new person in the eye.
"Are you telling me you wanna prove who's the
better gambler, or something?" Yazzee said to the orange man. SPOWT
translated this.
"Of course, that's what I'm saying, you loon!!
Nobody upstages King Carrot. Nobody!!" The crowd was starting to get
nervous and excited. Yazzee and his new enemy, King Carrot, began to stare
eachother down viciously. Only time could tell exactly what was going to happen
next...
♠♣♥♦
The Goomba King's
fortress was built atop a nice, big platform that was just as grey and
brick-oriented as its main attraction. The four of Shy Guy, Snifit, Chak, and
David ran up the steps, across a stone walkway, past a few Goombas leaving the
building, and burst through the double doors.
"GOOMBA KIIIIIING!!" Shy Guy bellowed once he
and his group skidded to a halt. They were in some kind of reception area with
a desk in one corner and a bunch of seats arranged for waiting. There was a
small number of Goombas populating the vicinity. One of them was wearing a
tuxedo and was right in front of the angry mob. Their serious facial
expressions and poses along with their muscle power and their axe could not be
ignored by this individual.
"O-ho! So it's finally happening..." the
Goomba in the tuxedo said while smirking. He suddenly raised his voice and the
few Goombas that were in the room scattered. "RED ALERT! RED ALERT!
TERRORISTS ARE HERE FOR THE GOOMBA KING! I REPEAT, TERRORISTS ARE HERE! RED
ALERT! RED ALERT!"
Shy Guy ran up to the screaming man and delivered a
harsh kick into his gut. PUNT!! The Goomba went flying down the hallway. He was
down for the count. However, Chak could hear a sea of footsteps coming their
way from quite a few directions surrounding them. He took his gigantic axe off
of his back and readied it.
"So much for the warm welcome," the
axe-wielder muttered. He swung his weapon in preparation. "Let's give 'em
all we got!!"
"Yes, let's!" Shy Guy agreed. He reached
behind himself and pulled out a huge stone, Y-shaped weapon. It vaguely
resembled something he recognized. "WHOA!! What happened to my
slingshot?!"
"It got clubbified," Snifit answered. He was
twisting his head around, trying to make sure he wouldn't pull any muscles in
the upcoming battle.
"Whoa," Shy Guy said, examining his new and
improved slingshot. "That's interesting."
"Enough chat. We've got work to do!!" David
grabbed a hold of something by his right hip with his right hand and held it
out with the help of all ten fingers. Shy Guy looked at his weapon of choice
and was surprised. He gasped.
"David, you'll put someone's eye out with that
thing!!" he protested.
"I know, I know," the little boy said. He had
his pistol pointed ahead of him, waiting for the pending trouble. It came.
Within seconds, the flood was upon them. From the hallway here, the hallway
there, and even the airducts over their heads, the enemy Goombas rushed in.
They were still wearing their poorly-done costumes from the play, but the
intruders could see from a closer distance than before that they all had
tattoos, missing teeth, and were in desperate need of some shaving.
"IT'S PARTY TIME!!" Shy Guy yelled. As if on
cue, the dubious Goombas started lunging, kicking, and tumbling at their
enemies to bite them, headbonk them, and whatnot. In return, Shy Guy started
whipping cannonballs out of nowhere, placing them in his overgrown slingshot
and firing away. Snifit started testing out some new techniques on the foes,
Chak started swinging his axe, and David started shooting this way and that way
as part of the bout.
The Goombas representing the Shy Gang tried showing Shy
Guy what they were made of, but it was no use. BAM! BAM! BAM! One by one, he
was able to take each of them down with some of his hard-hitting cannonballs.
Each one visibly dealt damage to his adversaries. One of them got the wind
knocked out of him, another got his mask to shatter to pieces, a different one
got his mustache to explode into a million little hairs, and the last one got
nailed in the gut so he went flying down a hallway just like the one in the
tuxedo did. Once those four guys were down, it was the Super Mushroom League's
turn, but Shy Guy was ready...
Snifit was taking on a mob consisting of a bunch of
Goombas dressed as Yoshies, and Ravens, etc.. Like Shy Guy, this was no problem
for him. This was majorly due to the fact that instead of pellets, he
discovered that he could fire hoops of incinerating light at his foes. This
caught him by surprise at first, but he soon adjusted. They would try their
fancy attacks and their thorn-spitting maneuvers, but Snifit would just spit
back. He was winning. One dressed in a blue robe and a gas mask got a brand new
costume consisting of ashes and smoke, and another in a black robe and a white
mask got to suffer a similar fate. This batch of fighters was taking a great
beating from this 8-Bit, but still they refused to give in...
Goombas with rubber noses were no match for David. Few
of them even dared to try attacking him. They were the ones that ended up with
bullet wounds. Others would just flee in cowardice. They would go after other
intruders, but it wasn't as though they needed the help of David's
intimidatingly quickly-paced pistol. One Goomba suddenly showed up out of
nowhere. He was flying through the air, in perfect preparation to deliver a
spinning sidekick to the boy's face. This enemy wasn't fast enough. BANG! The
tiny troublemaker got nailed in the foot. He fell to the floor and rolled to
one side, groaning in agony. David remained on the look-out for more annoyances
asking for a lesson to be taught...
The Goombas that David were facing were giving him a
break. Instead, they decided to team up with the one dressed as an angel and
gang up on the mutated one. That was no easy task, either. Assault after
assault, move after move, nothing worked. The axe-wielder would simply swing
his weapon horizontally, vertically, and in every other way that helped. Some
blows merely clanged against the stone floor, resulting in the scattering of
some grey particles from newly made marks in the ground. Others would just sail
over their heads. It seemed they were more concentrated on dodging the bug's attacks
than actually trying to counter them. At some point, the angel one finally
managed to work up some courage and leap through the air for a head bonk
attack. SHIK! SHIK! With expertise skill, the bug was able to chop off the
wings of the pest. The Goomba fell to the floor in shock. Chak got another good
hold of his weapon. The Goombas that were all over him started having second
thoughts. They suddenly turned around and started running back through the
halls where they came from.
Shy Guy placed another oversized cannonball in his
transformed slingshot, Snifit started sucking in some air, David began to
reload, and Chak remained poised with his axe. The Goombas didn't want anymore
of this. They, too, turned around and ran off. Both Chak and Shy Guy began to
lower their weapons.
"Hahaha!" Shy Guy laughed. "I guess we
showed 'em, eh?"
"Perhaps we did," Chak agreed. He started to
return his axe to his back.
Snifit looked suspicious. "You sure the coast is
clear?" he asked.
"I doubt it," David warned. "Be on
guard!"
"Indeed," Chak said. He pulled his axe back
out. "They're coming back!"
"What?! Don't those idiots know when to give
up?" Shy Guy fumed. He put his giant slingshot back up and readied another
metal sphere. His other two companions maintained their fighting stances as
well. While waiting uncomfortably for the next wave to arrive, the four of them
could hear rumbling sounds between pauses and feel rough vibrations in their
feet. Both gradually became more and more prominent as the clock ticked.
Foom... FOOM... FOOM!!...
"What are they up to?!" Chak griped. The
others were wondering very much the same thing. FOOM!!! Finally, their
questions were answered. They looked up as two new enemies showed up in one of
the hallways. More specifically: it was just the two dressed up as a Sackit and
a Koopa, but armed with these collossal, green boots with wind-up keys rotating
in the back. Their mushroom-like heads poked out of the tops of these things as
they manned them, somehow. The two parties glared at eachother, and then the
mayhem could ensue once more. Simultaneously, the two Goombas caused their
mechanical boots to fly up into the air and come crashing down on the quartet.
Shy Guy, Snifit, Chak, and David scattered just in time. WHAM!! Clouds of dust
flew from where the dangerous duo landed. The intruders were a little dizzy and
visually-impaired from the blow and the dust, but tried soon to get a hold of
themselves.
"Alright, you asked for it!!" Shy Guy
threatened. He aimed his cannonball at the one dressed like a Sackit, and
fired. Unfortunately, this was when it used its gigantic boot to jump up into
the air for another attack. WHACK!! The cannonball bounced off the sole of this
boot. Flustered by this turn of events, Shy Guy reached for another cannonball.
But then... WHAM!! The boot crashed down hard atop his head. Feeling whoozy
while the enemy was busy hopping off where it landed, Shy Guy dropped his
club-like slingshot, and fell forward without consciousness.
"SHY GUY!!" Snifit shrieked. He angrily tore
his gaze off the downed brute and looked at the Sackit Goomba. He was ready to
fire another one of his glowing rings at the guy, but WHAM!! He got knocked
out, too.
"Oh, goodness," David fretted.
"Well, it looks like it's up to us!!" Chak declared.
He ran forward for the one dressed as a Koopa that knocked out the other 8-Bit
with his axe held high. The Koopa Goomba took note of this, but didn't take
action. Chak jumped through the air and slammed his blade into the boot.
CRISSHH!! His weapon got shattered into a million pieces. He fell back in
shock. "NO! MY AXE!!" he wailed.
"I'll have no more of this," David growled. He
pointed his pistol at the one dressed as a Koopa. But first, he heard a grunt
and a thud. He looked at Chak who had fallen unconscious for some reason.
"CHAK!! NOT YOU, TOO?!" he yelled. Suddenly, the Sackit one leapt up
from behind the other Goomba and landed in front of David. The force knocked
him to the ground. His pistol flew from his grasp. "NO!!" the boy
yelled. Suddenly, the Goomba in front of him started making snorting noises.
David looked up helplessly in confusion. The Goomba fired. TSING!! David
grabbed one side of his neck with his left hand. The fiend had spat some kind
of little needle into it. "You..." he tried saying.
"Dishonorable..." He couldn't finish his sentence. Everything got
dark and his mind got foggy. Then he just passed out. The last thing he could
hear before slipping away was the triumphant laughter of these two jerks...
♠♣♥♦
Things were
beginning to heat up at the casino. Both the crowd and the two of Yazzee and
King Carrot had stepped aside for a new person to waltz into the scene. It was
a blue-shelled Terra Pin in a sparkling, white tuxedo wearing a pair of
gold-rimmed glasses. He walked up to the two rival gamblers with his cane in
hand and two cronies beside him. One of them was a Terra Pin in a scruffy,
brown suit and a dark red shell. The other crony was slightly shorter and had
on a yellow shell and a T-shirt. Once standing before the two gamblers, the guy
in the white tux stopped and turned around to face the spectators. His fellow
gang-members turned around as well and stood beside him.
"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls," said
the white tuxedo-wearing one, "let's get this contest going." The
crowd began to murmur amongst themseleves excitedly. This new man turned around
and looked at the two scowling gambling-fanatics. Yazzee was pounding his fist
into his palm, and King Carrot was simply grimacing with his two lackeys behind
him. The man started speaking again. "Here, we have two angry men. Both of
which would like to show the other who's who in the world of gambling." He
turned around to face the viewers. "What you are about to witness is a
show of luck, skill, and mostly luck." He turned around again. This time,
he looked at the yellow Yoshi. "Yazzee Yoshino, citizen of Yoshi's
Island..." he said to him. He gestured to the other guy. "And King
Carrot, resident of unknown parts..." He faced them both. "The first
to get a triple-seven shall be the victor. In addition to this, he will get all
of the money his opponent earned through all his misturns as well as his own.
Until then, I, ProZD Koopa, the contest judge, will be calling all the shots.
Each round, I will count to three, and you two will pull the levers. You will
stop at will. This contest won't be over until it's over." SPOWT
translated this to Yazzee. The two of him and King Carrot nodded at their
judge's words, still bearing serious looks. "Just remember," ProZD
said, "this is a contest, and nothing more. There will be no pulling of
the lever before I'm done counting or you will be penalized. Also, no kicking
or punching from the sore-loser will be tolerated. Understood?" SPOWT did
its translating and Yazzee and King Carrot nodded. "Good," said
ProZD. He walked away from the contestants. "Places eveyone!" he
called out. Yazzee and King Carrot got into their respective seats before their
own slot machines. They turned their heads to give some dirty looks to one
another.
King Carrot snarled. "Grrr..."
Yazzee made a high-pitched growling sound.
"Brrr!!"
The audience started murmuring some more and Carro and
Boscis started swapping comments. "The boss is in way over his head!"
Carro whimpered. "Look at that guy! He's up to his ears in loot!" The
lesser carrot was referring to Yazzee's pile of money-filled bags.
"Don't worry about it," said Boscis. "The
boss'll be fine."
One of ProZD's attendants, the one with the red shell,
turned to the yellow-shelled one and said, "Say, Boland, which of these
two people is your money on?"
"Mm, I'm not sure," said Boland. He turned to
his partner. "What about you, Kohler?"
"I'm going with the carrot," said the
red-shelled man. "He looks more experienced..." The one betting on
King Carrot was referring to the wrinkles upon the face of Yazzee's opponent.
Surely, in some way, that was a plus.
"If you say so."
"They're betting to see who will win the
contest."
"Heh," Yazzee chuckled. "Funny... They
used to do the exact same thing to Boshi..."
ProZD pulled a handgun out of one of his pockets. He
pointed it into the air and began the countdown. "Ready?" he asked
the contestants. They both nodded. "Alright... One... Two..." Yazzee
and King Carrot both sat in their seats, waiting anxiously for that third
number. Their eyes didn't blink and their grips on the levers weren't
relenting. Finally, it came. "THREE!!" BANG! SHUNK! ProZD pulled the
trigger, the wheels started spinning, and the crowd was going crazy. There
wasn't a single soul in the room not affected by the eruption of this contest.
Yazzee and King Carrot began pouring their hearts out, eager to see the outcome
of this competition. Everyone watched and waited...
♠♣♥♦
At first, Shy
Guy, Snifit, Chak, and David were unconscious. Everything was completely black
and uninformative. Then they came to, and things started to gradually make a
little more sense.
"Well," said Shy Guy, rubbing his scalp while
sitting on the stone floor, "that did a number on MY noggin!"
"You're telling me," Snifit agreed. He was
making similar movements and stretching his body while he was at it.
"Where are we?" Chak asked.
"In a dungeon, of some sort?" David suggested,
rubbing his neck.
"Correct," they heard a voice say that wasn't
too far from them. They turned their heads in the direction of where this voice
sounded. "You're in the Goomba King's fortress's dungeon. Or should I say
my dungeon?" The person that was speaking was a Goomba with two tufts of
black hair sticking out of his face to call a mustache, a pair of pants that
were striped blue and white, and a crown with a blue cushion to match atop his
head. Whoever this guy was, his words seemed to clear a few things up. The
place they found themselves in was just as stone and grey as the others of the
fortress. They were in a four-sided room with a high ceiling and stairs leading
to a door with a barred window. The four of them, in addition to this crowned
Goomba, were with four more consisting of a Goomba in a white lab-coat, a
Goomba dressed as a lumberjack, a Goomba with green skin and a pair of
antannae, and a Clumph.
"What in the name of Bonus Games?" Snifit
muttered.
"Hey, who are you people?" Shy Guy asked.
"And aren't you the Goomba King? Everyone says your plays are
boring."
"True," said the crowned Goomba. "They
do. And yes, I am the Goomba King. Or should I say I was?"
"What happened?" David said.
"One day," the story began, "a Goomba and
his gang of misfits had come to our town. They wanted to overthrow me, and they
did. More specifically, they threw me and my four best actors in here. That
Goomba now runs Goomba Grove pretending to be me, and his gang is pretending to
be the actors." His quartet of humble servants shook their heads solemnly.
"That's terrible," Chak sympathized.
"Yes, I know," the crowned Goomba nodded.
"Ever since, we have been dwelling down here, knowing that an imposter is
running the show, but not knowing how to get out of here."
"Then I guess we were looking for the fake Goomba
King," David said.
"Yeah, we gotta teach that guy a lesson, or
two," Snifit stated.
"It's the right thing to do!" Chak exclaimed.
The real Goomba King nodded.
"It's wonderful that you wish to help us," the
royal Goomba replied, "but I'm afraid we're stuck here."
Shy Guy had the bottom of his mask in his hand out of
contemplation. Then he removed it from its place, turned it into a fist and
smacked it into the palm of the other hand. "Doc," he said to the
town's former-ruler, "you just leave that to me! I know plenty of ways out
of here!"
The other eight inhabitants of the vicinity all let
their eyes widen at the brutal 8-Bit. "You do??" said the authentic
Goomba King.
"Is there anything you don't know?" Snifit
muttered, shaking his head.
Everyone watched as the gigantic Shy Guy waltzed up the
stairs and stopped before the door leading to that place. "This
door," he said while beginning to crack his knuckles. "I can just
knock it down!" A good portion of the people in the room gasped at the
8-Bit's words and started murmuring amongst themselves.
"Now why didn't I think of that?!" the Clumph
muttered.
Shy Guy stretched his muscles in preparation. He kept
his eyes on the prize, readied one beefy arm, and...
"Wait!" said the Goomba in the lab-coat. With
his concentration ruined, Shy Guy dropped his arm and turned around. "If
you're going to knock something down, make it that wall over there!" The
Goomba gestured toward his right and Shy Guy looked to his left. The other
members of the dungeon were making similar movements so they, too, could have a
look at said wall. "Those boots they use..." the Goomba said.
"Noone can get past them." He strut over to the wall he was talking
about, walking between Snifit and Chak to his left and David to his right.
"If my calculations are correct, then knocking this down will lead us to a
shortcut to the control room where we can cut off their power source. Then
you'll be able to find the Goomba King with ease!"
With his arms folded, Shy Guy considered this Goomba's
proposal and gave a questioning look to Snifit. "It's worth a shot,"
the grey 8-Bit said. Shy Guy nodded and descended the stairs. He lumbered over
to where the lab-coat-wearing Goomba was and started preparing himself for the
blow like before.
"Alright, everyone, stand back!" the
muscle-man requested. Everyone took a few steps back as they were told. The
Goomba that was next to him took several. Shy Guy eyed the wall carefully, then
after getting himself as ready as possible, he leaned back and held up his
right fist. Everyone watched in anticipation as this bodybuilder prepared for
the demolition. Then he shot his powerful fist forward and CRASH!! It slammed
against the wall's stone surface and caused a prodigious portion of what he had
hit and what was surrounding it to suddenly give away and crumble into a pile
of broken bricks. Everyone saw this in pure awe, but could only see a cloud of
dust acting as the result of this destructive man's actions. Then the cloud
disappeared, and they could see that a whole new door had been added to the
sanctum. A cavern lied beyond that. The Goomba that told the Shy Guy to do this
was more than pleased.
"Eureka!!" he shouted. "It's still
here!" He excitedly scuttled up to the new door and stood beside Shy Guy.
"This cave leads to two places: the Goomba King's room, and the control
room. To the control room we go!!" After that, he hopped onto the pile of
rubble that had been created and ran off into the darkness. The other seven
members of the place got up off the floor and began to follow the calculative
one's example. The lumberjack Goomba and the green Goomba ran on through. The
Clumph stopped before Shy Guy to precede his action of leaving the dungeon as
well.
"You're a piece of work, you know that?" the
burly creature said to him. Shy Guy scratched the back of his head. "I
could learn something from you..." With that, the Clumph left the place as
well. Next, it was the real Goomba King's turn.
"Thank you, strong one," he said. "I feel
as though hope is just around the corner. Come! We mustn't dilly-dally!"
After saying this, the crowned Goomba scurried on through like the others did.
Chak went next. "You truly are amazing, Shy
Guy," said the bug man.
"Aw, go on," Shy Guy said. Chak also walked
through the new door. David was up.
"You're one surprise after another," the boy
said. "I still think you'd make a terrible father, though."
"Hee hee," Shy Guy chuckled. Snifit looked
annoyed.
"Alright, alright. Shy Guy's awesome. Can we go
already?" said the grey one. The other two seemed to agree.
"Alright," said David. "We go." He
walked through the door as the sixth person to do so. Snifit was about to be
the seventh, but once he got onto the rubble, Shy Guy bent down and ensnared
the smaller person in a vicious hug. He lifted his kicking teammate off the
ground forcefully and commenced squeezing.
"Lemme go, you big oaf!!" Snifit demanded.
"Snifit... You said I'm awesome! I'm so
happy," the emotional Shy Guy stated. He squeezed some more and Snifit
squirmed some more. With much difficulty, the smaller 8-Bit was at last able to
release himself from the musclar person's grasp, slide through his massive
arms, and plop back onto the rubble. The landing was rough. He tried to shake
the feeling off.
"Yeah, yeah. Can we go now?" he asked.
Shy Guy folded his arms and nodded. "Let's
go!" he cheered. At last, the duo of Shy Gang-members could leave the
place...
Soon after that, a group of nine was wandering through a
cave hidden somewhere amidst the fortress of Goomba Grove. Walking around in
the dark for a while, impatience got to Shy Guy, so he called out to the first
Goomba to enter this new place.
"Hey, brainy guy," he said, "how much
longer 'til we get to that control room you keep talking about?"
"It's just a littl-OOF!" While he was talking,
he bumped his face flat against a rock wall. OOF! OOF! OOF! OOF! A bunch of
other people ended up colliding into him as a result. That cavern was too dang
dark. Once they all backed away and rubbed their sore areas, the Goomba up
front got to speaking again. "This is the fork," he said. "To
the left leads to the Goomba King's room. To the right is where we're
going."
"Alright! Let's go!" Shy Guy said. The group
started to turn to the right and head down a slightly different path in the
underground vicinity. They trekked onward until they started hearing things
that spelled bad news.
"HEY, THEY'RE GONE!!"
"LOOK! THE WALL!"
"Of all the- Come on. They can't be far."
Chak heard these voices from behind and put their
meaning into words. "Incoming! More villains are on the loose!!" he
yelled. The other members of the group started to murmur, worriedly.
"For goodness' sake," David grumbled. He
reached for his gun, and got a hold of only air. Confused, he started patting
around other areas of his clothes in search of the device. "What the- My
gun's gone!!"
"And I lost my axe trying to fight one of those
things," Chak growled. "Blast it!!"
The Goombas that used to run the town were starting to
get nervous by the sound of these new disadvantages. Snifit took note of how
Shy Guy was patting around for his weapon the way David had. He shook his head.
Then he took it upon himself to calm the crowd. "Don't worry about
it!" he announced. All eyes turned to him. "You guys just go on
ahead. I've got this one taken care of!" He stepped away from the clique
and started stretching. He didn't hear footsteps behind him. He turned around
and noticed they were still standing around, looking at him. "GO!!"
he ordered. That snapped them out of it. They started jogging to the right as
they were meant to earlier. Snifit heard the sounds of their feet fade away and
saw the image of the oncoming angry Goombas fade in.
"THERE'S ONE OF 'EM! GET 'IM!!" Snifit heard.
The Goombas charged but Snifit just stood there shaking his head. Once they got
close enough, TSSEEWW!! He used his rod-like snout to fire another one of his
new hoop-shaped projectiles of energy to fry an entire row of enemies. They
fell to the ground as a clutter of charred Goombas. The ones that remained
standing looked at their fallen comrades and this new opponent in horror.
"This guy's too much!!" one of the Goombas
complained. "We must retreat!!"
"No way! It's just a gnat and his doughnuts! How
hard can it be?!" barked another one. His peers whimpered at the sound of
this and the menacing look on Snifit's face. Reluctantly, they started running
towards him again.
"I'll show you what a gnat and his doughnuts can
do," Snifit said below his breath. TSEW! TSEW! TSEW!! More crispy Goombas
were made. They were no match for this dangerous person, yet the fighting
continued...
The path that the rest of the group had taken only lead
to another wall. After being told to do so, Shy Guy started putting his
strength to good use and unleashed it by making yet another doorway with a pile
of rubble beneath it. CRASH!! After this, the nine of them filed their ways
into the room that this new portal had behind it and, in the process, managed
to discover exactly what they had been looking for. This new room was very cold
and steril as the place was made of metal. It consisted of a huge, block-shaped
machine with various blinking lights, tubes, and wires sticking out of it and a
large computer-screen right next to it that stood atop a vast control panel.
Before this display of buttons was another Goomba in a lab-coat sitting in a
rotating chair. The team that had entered this place stood where the new hole
had been made and grabbed the technician's attention. He spun around and looked
at these intruders. He let out a shrill gasp.
"Who are you?!" he demanded. "What are
you doing here?!?"
"Dr. Goom, I presume?" said the other
lab-coat-wearing Goomba. The Clumph was looking eager. His calculative
companion looked at the eager one and nodded. The Clumph got the message and
pulled out his club. Everyone watched as he stomped his way over to the guy in
the rotating chair. He started pleading for mercy.
"No, no, NO!!" the Goomba begged, shaking his
head vigorously. "You don't want to hurt me! I'm very important!
PLEASE!!"
KONK!! Too late. The Clumph brought his weapon down hard
against the enemy's skull, who went out like a light. He slipped into
unconsciousness, groaned, and slid off his seat. The group witnessed his
plopping onto the floor, and carried their activities forward.
"Good work," said the calculative Goomba who
hadn't been knocked out. The Clumph nodded back. He turned around and looked at
the green Goomba and the lumberjack one. "Now you two go do something
about that machine!"
"Affirmative, sir," said the green one.
"Hi-ho!" said the lumberjack one. Together,
they ran up to the device and got to work. The real Goomba King began to
address the three of Shy Guy, Chak, and David.
"Things are definitely looking up!" he said.
The trio nodded in agreement...
Meanwhile, Snifit was busy taking note of more Goombas
he had just defeated. Only two were left.
One of them looked at the other and said, "Gosh
darn it!! I told you this guy was too much!!"
"Alright, alright. Plan B!!" his cohort
conceded. They ran off and disappeared back into the dungeon where they came from,
but Snifit remained alert. Patiently, the 8-Bit waited. He wondered what
exactly their little backup plan could possibly be and expected the worst. Just
when he was beginning to narrow down the possibilites, his fears became a
reality. He could hear it and he could feel it. Foom... FOOM... FOOM!!...
"Oh no," Snifit whimpered. "Please,
no," he begged. Whether he liked it or not, very bad things were coming to
his town, and they were most likely going to bring about the most dreadful of
misfortunes...
Foom... FOOM... FOOM!!... The others could sense it,
too. It gave them a little something more to listen to besides the sound of
hacking, firing, and exploding that was quickly introduced to them. However,
this new sound didn't seem to depict that a devious machine was being
destroyed. Chak and David found it most unnerving.
"Gentlemen," David said. "I fear for
Snifit."
The real Goomba King turned around and looked at the
child. "You're rather mature for a little boy, aren't you?" he
commented. David grimaced.
"Don't worry about him," Shy Guy reassured.
"He was abducted by space aliens, remember?"
"Maybe we should check up on him regardless just in
case," Chak suggested.
"Isn't there anything we can do?" David asked.
"All we can do," said the Goomba of royalty,
"is speed things along." He suddenly raised his voice. "HEY, YOU
TWO, YOU THINK YOU COULD HURRY IT UP?!"
"YES, SIR!!" the machine's destroyers
responded. Not contradictingly, the sounds of hacking, firing, and exploding
started to get more frequent. However, the sound of the enemies' unstoppable
weapon approaching started to get louder...
Snifit didn't dare run away. He stood and watched until
the things arrived. Finally, they were there, right in front of him. Those two
giant, green boots that defeated him and his friends earlier were back for
more. The pair of Goombas piloting them chuckled once again. Snifit started to
sweat. His two adversaries had their objective ringing quite clearly in their
heads. Focusing on just that and nothing else, they prepared to deliver unto
the intruder the next blow. Snifit winced, expecting horrible defeat. But
then...
KABOOOOOMM!! The machine had finally been blown to
pieces. Its fragments scattered all over the metallic room. Fortunately, noone
was hurt. They all started cheering their lungs out in victory.
Being done with that, the Goomba King said,
"Mission accomplished! Now there's only one more thing to do." He
looked at Shy Guy, Chak, and David again. "You three! Go get that
imposter! Goomba Grove is counting on you!"
Shy Guy folded his masculine arms and chuckled.
"Wait until Snifit hears about this one," he mused.
"No more hold-ups! We leave!" said his
insect-like companion. The other two concurred with this and left the control
room.
"GOOD LUCK!!" the Goomba King called out...
Snifit was confused. Those boots hadn't attacked! He
opened his eyes and noticed that steam was rising from them. The Goombas that
were piloting them were just as confused as he was. This soon was no longer
exactly how Snifit felt. He let mischievous triumph take him, and he leaned
back. The two Goombas faced the Snifit and their eyes turned wide with horror.
They tried ducking, but TSEW! TSEW!! Snifit spat out two more of his deadly
doughnuts. FSST! FSST!! They nailed the fiends exactly where the 8-Bit wanted
them to. Burnt to a crisp, they got knocked out of their seats, fell backwards
through the air, and plopped down onto the rock floor as a duo of black,
unmoving figures. This was the result of Snifit's little encounter with their
special weapons. He performed a pirouette, and stopped himself in a position
facing the fallen foes with his legs spread out and his right arm against his
hip. He kissed his left hand and raised into the air. He remained in this pose
for a few seconds, and then heard some loud clapping and cheering from behind
him. Startled, he turned around only to find out it was just his teammates.
"SNIFIT, SNIFIT! HE'S OUR MAN! IF HE CAN'T DO IT,
NO-ONE CAN!" Shy Guy crowed. Snifit was simultaneously flattered and
embarrassed. The big one knew how to rub it in. Then the applause died down,
and he added something else in a calmer tone. "Oh, yeah. And the Goomba
King says the town's countin' on us. Heh heh." Snifit frowned.
"Well?" Shy Guy said. "Let's go get 'im!!"
"YES! The imposter awaits!" Chak declared.
Shortly after such a pep-rally, the quartet of visitors turned back around and
headed on through the cave once more. This time, they took a left...
"How did you learn to do that, Snifit?" David
asked.
"Eh," said the 8-Bit, "it's just like
spitting out pellets, but different!"
"I see... Wish I could do that..."
Their times of spending moments in a cavern and its
darkness had come to a conclusion. At the end of this dank tunnel was a ladder
leading somewhere. With Shy Guy in the lead, their ascension of it could at
last commence...
♠♣♥♦
Seven... Seven...
Snifit. Seven... Seven... Cherry.
"DARN IT!" Yazzee and King Carrot said at
once.
The crowd, on the other hand, went,
"OOHHHHHH!!" This contest had been dragging on long, but there was
never a dull moment. Every time ProZD counted to three, he'd fire. Every time
he'd fire, the two gamblers would try their luck. Every time they did, they
were one symbol off. This had resulted in the formation of two extremely big
piles of money-bags. King Carrot was catching up with Yazzee, but the Yo'ster
refused to let that give him any doubts. The two of them had confidence as
enormous and unstoppable as a glacier. Seeing that the competition was still
not over, ProZD lifted his gun again, and counted.
"One..." Yazzee and King Carrot were both
shaking in their boots. The grips they had on their levers were unwavering.
They concentrated with all their might on listening for the third number and
going for another yank. "Two..." It seemed like eternity was running
its course. When was that guy going to finish counting?! "Th-"
SH-SHUNK! Seven... Seven... Star. KST-KCKHSQCHSHTT!! The two of them had jumped
the gun and got the same outcome. More coins spilled out of their machines.
"DARN IT!" they said again.
"OOHHHHHH!!" the audience said again. ProZD
was not amused by this. He said something to Boland and Kohler. The two of them
nodded and they each walked up to a different pile of cash. Yazzee and King
Carrot had horrified looks on their faces as they watched this. Both of ProZD's
attendants had just walked up to their winnings and taken a bag of it. They
walked back to where the tuxedo-wearing one was. The pair of contestants were
steamed.
"Hey, you, give that back!!" Yazzee demanded.
"Don't touch my money, you thieves!!" King
Carrot spat.
ProZD just scoffed. "You broke the rules. You got
penalized. Deal with it."
SPOWT translated this and the two robbed ones started
grumbling to themselves. They had to stop, though, once their judge put his gun
into the air again. For about the billionth time that day, everyone including
Boland, Kohler, Carro, Boscis, SPOWT, the two gamblers, and the audience got
ready for the counting. The contest continued...
♠♣♥♦
A Goomba with a
red crown, red and white pants, and a certain type of mustache sat in a throne
before a long, red carpet. In this humungous room, the Goomba was being paid a
visit by three more of his stubby servants.
"So, your highness," said the one in the
middle, "what do you have in store for the next play?"
"Hmm..." said the throned Goomba. "Make
it about... the time I had to get my crown waxed."
"Ooh, excellent choice, your excellence!" said
the middle Goomba. "Don't worry, your majesty. We'll be sure to make it
EXTRA boring!"
"Indeed," said the servant's master. The other
two Goombas were nodding profusely.
"This'll be great!!" the middle one dragged
on. He started hopping in place, alternating between one foot and the other.
"We're gonna make it the most incredibly, unbelievably, incomparably,
impossibly, horrendously, terribly, horribly, boringestly boring play in the
whole, entire-"
-WHAM!! "AAUUUUggghhh!!!..." Something beneath
where the Goomba was hopping flung open and sent him flying backwards out of
the room. The remaining members of the area looked at where he had flown and
what caused him to do this in astonishment. It turned out he was standing on a
hatch and that a huge Shy Guy had forced the thing open.
"PHEW!" he grunted. "I thought this thing
would NEVER come off! It was like someone was standing on it or
something!" The three Goombas exchanged weird looks. Suddenly, a lightbulb
turned on. Shy Guy pointed to the one on the throne. "Hey, you're that
Goomba King imposter guy, aren't ya?"
"SHY GUY, MOVE IT!!"
"Alright, alright. Hold your horses." Shy Guy
crawled out of the hatch and onto the red carpet. The two Goombas stepped back,
and the three of them and their superior watched in even more confusion as
three more people came into the room using this strange entrance. Shy Guy,
Snifit, David, and Chak stood in a row before the felon.
"'Bout time," Snifit grumbled. He and the
others swept themselves off. Snifit looked at the fake Goomba King and pointed.
"Alright, buddy, listen up!!"
"Your plays are boring!!" David said.
"They were so boring, I fell asleep before they
even started!!" Chak added.
Shy Guy scratched the back of his head. "Um, I
personally liked them, but-"
"-WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING JUST STANDING AROUND
HERE?!" the fake Goomba King suddenly shrieked. The pair of Goombas he
yelled at suddenly jolted themselve attentive. "THESE PESTS DON'T BELONG
HERE!! DO SOMETHING!!"
"Yes, s-" KONK!! Thud. Before they could carry
out any orders, Shy Guy and Chak had used a leg and an arm to deal heavy blows
to their brown heads. Two more enemies had been defeated. The fake Goomba King
was alone.
"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!?" he screamed.
"INTRUDERS!! INTRUDERS, INTRUDERS, INTRUDERS!!!" The impersonator
jumped up and down in his royal seat, yelling madly.
"Shy Guy! Grab him!" David ordered.
Shy Guy gave the back of his head some more scratching.
"Okay, but-"
"-DO IT!!" the boy demanded. Shy Guy didn't
waste another second. Reluctantly, he started striding towards the fake
monarch. The helpless convict began to flip out.
"STAY AWAY FROM ME, BEAST!!" He jumped out of
his throne before Shy Guy could take another step. Shy Guy sighed and let the
chase begin. Desperately, the little criminal started running all over the
room, making them go in squares rather than circles. Snifit, Chak, and David
kept their eyes on them, cheering on their partymember all the while.
"COME ON, SHY GUY!! HE'S NOT THAT HARD!"
"GO, SHY GUY!! GET THAT SCOUNDREL!!"
"YOU CAN DO IT, SHY GUY!! COME ON!"
Both of the running ones were beginning to pant and
breathe heavily. The fake Goomba King's legs had held out for as long as they
could. No backup power was left in store for them. Not seeking defeat, his pace
began to die down with his tongue flailing out of his mouth. Shy Guy, on the
other hand, was still in his prime. He suddenly sprang up into the air, cast a
looming shadow over the fated Goomba, let his eyes widen in terror, and came
crashing down.
"NOOOOOO!!" the false king bellowed.
FWUMPITY-WHUMPITY-WHUMP!! Shy Guy slammed into the king, grabbing a tight hold
of him in the process, and went tumbling across the stone floor. Shy Guy landed
on his feet and turned towards his comrades who ran up to the squirming Goomba
Fake. "You won't get away with this, fiends!! You'll be sorry you messed with
the great and all powerful Goomba King!!" the imposter wailed.
"Can it, you loon!!" Snifit ordered. The con
continued struggling in Shy Guy's powerful grip. David got the lecture going.
"You're a shameless, unscrupulous, dishonest
bigot!" the boy insulted. "Do you know what you've done to these
people? You've turned them into a bunch of poor, unmotivated souls who drag
their feet wherever they go! Have you no grasp of what's right or wrong??"
Chak went next. "You no-good, selfish buffoon! How
dare you take away these people's entertainment?! It's the only thing that
keeps them alive and you've taken it away from them!! Why would you do such a
thing?!"
"I did it..." the false Goomba King grunted.
"I did it... because I love power!!" His four accusers widened their
eyes at this remark. He started squirming less in Shy Guy's hold. "I love
power. I love wearing a crown and sitting in a throne. I love having a big
fortress and keeping a million people under my thumb!!" The others were
making sure to hear him out. "I love being able to have complete and total
control over their emotions. All it takes is a few measly plays? Pah!! I could
make it about grass growing, and they'd STILL watch it!!" He started
catching up with his breath, and he ceased his struggling in Shy Guy's arms.
After he finished panting he continued. "I even love wearing these stripey
pants!!" After the speech, the five people in the room kept silent for a
few seconds. All that could be heard was the power-hungry Goomba's faint
breathing. Then Snifit broke the silence.
"Do you love history?" he asked the fake
Goomba King.
"I loathe it," he responded.
"Good," Snifit said mischievously. He walked a
little closer to the Goomba and everyone else had their eyes on him,
cautiously. Snifit took a deep breath. A very deep breath. He held it for a few
seconds, and then let a river of information spill from his mouth very quickly.
"During the Shy War, the Super Mushroom League was forced to face the Shy
Gang alone, which means that they did not seek the help of Naji or Razule or
any of those people, although they did all have their own intentions that were
all in one or way or another, more or less, related to the real crisis at hand
which was about the bringing back of a GODDESS, not a female monster, named
Tondariya, who wanted to make the world a better place in the eyes of the
leader of the Shy Gang, the exalted Shy King, who is now dead, along with many
others as a result of a very unusual occurance that happened near the end of
this war thanks to a certain individual with a clouded background, but if
there's anything that can be truly confirmed, it's that the Shy Gang, the Super
Mushroom League, the Demonic Jesters, and all those people could be anywhere
right now, doing anything, which is probably none of your business, and that is
what REALLY happened, you informationally-challenged imbecile!!!" Snifit
panted, but the others still stood like statues without blinking at the
history-oriented 8-Bit. After catching up with his breath, Snifit got to say
something else. "Wanna hear about the Demonic Jesters?"
"FREAAAKS!!! LEMME OUT OF HERE!! YOU'RE ALL A BUNCH
OF DERANGED FREAKS!!" the fake Goomba King responded.
"Wellp! You heard him Shy Guy," Chak said.
"Let him out of here!"
Shy Guy had a questioning facial expression. "What?
he asked.
"Show him the way out!" Chak elaborated.
"Show him that thing shaped like a rectangle that people go in and out of
sometimes. That thing you can break if you send something flying through it
hard enough." David was beginning to let a sneaky grin creep onto his
face. "That thing that swings open. That thing that's made of glass. That
thing that begins with a 'W' and ends with a-"
"'W?'" Shy Guy inquired. "I dunno, Chak.
I think that thing's called a window."
"Shy Guy, you dolt, just huck him out of the thing
already," Snifit said.
"I couldn't do that!" Shy Guy said. David made
his way over to one of the wide windows embedded into the wall behind the
throne. He grabbed a hold of the latch in the middle, and let its two halves
swing out. He gestured towards its void and the orange, darkening sky behind
it. "Oh, I dunno," Shy Guy hesitated. "He could get hurt, or
something."
"Oh, let me do it," Chak insisted. He wrestled
the squirming criminal from Shy Guy's grasp, and walked the Goomba over to the
window. Snifit had his hands by his waist in satisfaction and David was still
grinning. Finally, Chak was before the window. He had the struggling, fake
Goomba King in one three-fingered hand and one eye closed.
"Don't you dare huck me through that thing,"
the enemy growled. "DON'T DO IT!!!" Chak ignored the Goomba's words.
He flexed his insect muscles, leaned back, concentrated hard, then thrust his
arm forward. The former Goomba King went soaring out the window.
"NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooo!!!..."
The town's four heroes stood watching the window and
what had disappeared into its orange sky in different moods. Snifit was glad a
guy who was such a klutz about history had gotten what was coming to him, Chak
was happy that a man who insisted on turning a town's plays into cures for
insomnia got what he deserved, and David was pleased that Goomba Grove was free
from that criminal's abusive rule. Shy Guy, however, felt a guy who made such
great plays deserved better. Regardless of whatever the case was, the job had
been done, and that was something they were all perfectly well aware of.
"Well, come on, guys," Snifit said. "Time
to go and top this off..." Chak and David nodded. Snifit turned around and
headed down the ladder that the hatch had beneath it. The boy and the bug soon
followed. They disappeared, leaving the muscular Shy Guy still standing in the
throne room, basking in his thoughts. He stood there with his brutal arms
hanging by his sides and not saying a word. He looked up at the ceiling, and
then he slowly tilted his head downward so he could look at his brown shoes. He
exhaled a deep sigh, shook his head, and started heading for the hatch as well.
Once all four heroes were down there, a few moments came to pass, and something
could be heard in that room. It was the sound of people cheering...
♠♣♥♦
BANG BANG BANG!
SHUNK SHUNK SHUNK! KST-KCK-KCKHSQCHSHTT!! The storm wasn't stopping. ProZD kept
shooting, Yazzee and King Carrot kept pulling, the wheels kept spinning, the
coins kept spilling, the gamblers kept cursing, and the crowd kept going wild.
It was an unrelentlessly continuous cycle. Some of the people were getting
restless.
"You know, Kohler," said Boland. "I'm
beginning to have my doubts. It's like there's no end to this!"
"You're probably right," said the red-shelled
one. "I mean, it's not like they're gonna stop any time soon."
"Hm," Boland grunted. "I'll give them
three hours."
"I'll give them four!"
Elsewhere, a couple of carrots had things of their own
to discuss. "Hey, Boscis," said Carro, "what do you think King
Boo and the Eight Spookalings are up to?"
"I have no idea, Carro. They're probably somewhere
out there, sucking the souls out of a few poor saps." Carro turned his
head away and made it nod in response. Boscis continued talking. "I hope
things are going well for them," he said. "It could mean big trouble
if they don't get those souls..."
"Hmm..."
"One... Two.. Three!!" BANG! SHUNK! Seven...
Seven... Turnip. Seven... Seven... Snifit.
"Jaggity-glabbit!!" Yazzee fumed.
"Confound it all!!" King Carrot growled.
KCKHSQCHSHTT!! The coins spilled, the crowd vocalized its awe, and ProZD pulled
his gun out again.
"One..."
I'll make Yo'ster Isle proud, Yazzee thought. It'll
be known as the home of the greatest gambler who ever lived...
"Two..."
I've got a title to maintain, King Carrot told
himself. I'm gonna beat this guy, even if it kills me!!
"THREE!!" BANG! SHUNK! And the evening went on
like that...
♠♣♥♦
DONG! DONG! DONG!
DONG! The bell was ringing again. Even though it was getting dark out, parents
and grandparents alike started ceasing their activities to leave their homes
and wander over to the big place, dragging the kids along as well, of course.
In time, like earlier that day, a whole crowd was before the stage. This time,
it was beneath a fading, purple sky.
"What's going on? Didn't we already see a show
today?"
"Whenever the bell rings, we come. That's the
rule."
"I hope it won't be something boring again..."
"Sshh!"
The bell stopped ringing, the curtains started being
pulled back, and the people put an end to their mumbling.
"Yyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay..." they all groaned. A Goomba in a red tuxedo to
replace the black one of before walked onto the stage. He stood in front of the
audience as calmly as possible. He observed the Goombas' bored facial
expressions, knowing exactly how they felt. Then he got the introduction going.
He sucked in some air, and got it started.
"LAAAAAADIIIIEES AND GENTLEMEEEENN!!" he
bellowed enthusiastically. Suddenly, all eyes in the crowd went wide open in
pure disbelief. They started chattering loudly amongst themselves at this turn
of events. The Goomba smirked satisfiedly at their reaction and continued.
"Are you ready for COMEDY!?!"
"Y-yes?" a few of the people in the crowd said
back.
The Goomba on-stage tried again. "Are you ready for
a horde of unforgettable jokes that'll knock your socks off?!?"
"YES?!" the crowd said back. This time, their
response was spoken by a few more Goombas and with more energy.
"Are you ready for awesomely, spectacularly,
wonderfully, outrageously, humorous, gut-busting, butt-gusting
FUNNINESS???"
"YYEEEEEESSS!!!" the crowd screamed, not being
able to take it anymore. Feeling dozens of weights being lifted from their
backs, they finally freed themselves and started hopping up and down in
excitement.
"Then what are we waiting for?!! Let's get this
party started!!!" The crowd cheered at the red man's speech. Seeing that
his work was done, he took a bow, turned to one side, and remained in that
position for a few seconds. As time went on, the crowd's craziness started to
slowly die down. What was that guy doing? Why was he just standing there? Was
the show going to start? Had it already begun? Was it just gonna be him
standing there? Had they been duped? Had funny shows not returned with a
vengeance? All these questions were answered as soon as their voices had dimmed
down completely, leaving the entire town in utter silence. The sky had become a
deeper shade of purple, allowing the stars to crawl into view, and the crickets
began their chirping. Staring forward, remaining still as rock, the Goomba
stood. The crowd continued wondering. Finally, he tilted his head back, and
leapt high up into the air. He did a backflip, landed behind where he stood
earlier, leapt again, did another backflip, landed again, and then did three
backflips in the middle of a particularly high jump. He landed on a place near
the edge of the stage, turned and bowed. The audience went ballistic again,
realizing what kind of entertainment the night had in store for them. Walking
off, the stage was empty again. Everyone got silent once more waiting for the
show to start. Then at last, it officially began, and they could all commence
laughing once again.
Two Goombas walked onto the stage. One was green and the
other was dressed like a lumberjack.
"Pretty nice planet you got here, Mr.
Zoontok," said the lumberjack, "but where are all the trees?!"
"We ate them all," said the Goomba playing Mr.
Zoontok.
"What?!? Then what am I supposed to do with this
axe?!" the lumberjack objected, pulling out that very weapon.
"Become an axe-murderer?" Zoontok suggested.
"That's a good idea, Mr. Zoontok! I could kill
people with this thing... Starting with you!!" The lumberjack waved the
axe around above his head, menacingly.
"I dare say, Mr. Timber, I don't think that a very
good idea," Zoontok objected.
"WHAT?! Why not? Give me one good reason..."
Mr. Timber lowered his axe and gave the interplanetary individual a weird look.
"Well, for starters, I-"
"-COME ON, ZOONTOK, I DON'T GOT ALL DAY!!!"
Timber interrupted, waving the axe again.
"I have a wife and kid," said Zoontok.
"YOU DO?? Show me!!" Timber demanded.
"Very well then. Follow me." The two Goombas
started walking towards the other side of the stage. Just before they could
reach the end of it, the Goomba in the lab-coat leapt out from behind the drawn
curtains and landed right in front of them.
"Oh! Uncle Zoontok! Thank goodness you're here. You
see, I've got a small problem-"
"Dr. Goober-poof, Mr. Timber. He's very pleased to
meet you," said Zoontok. Dr. Goober-poof looked Mr. Timber up and down
wide-eyed, then at the audience. He stuck out his tongue and shook his head.
"CAN I KILL HIM?!" the lumberjack spazzed. He
raised his axe like a lunatic again.
"I'm afraid not, Mr. Timber. He's family."
"Family, huh? Is he your nephew?"
"No, he's my wife and kid," Zoontok corrected.
Timber looked shocked.
"He's BOTH?!?" the lumberjack freaked out.
"Indeed. He can be several both things at once. For
instance: right now, he's angry and joyful simultaneously." The green
Goomba gestured towards Dr. Goober-poof who started saying something very
strange.
"Oh, Uncle Zoontok, this lab-coat is absolutely
ravishing!" the joyful doctor said while spinning on one foot. Then he
stopped. "But it's got this milk stain on it! It'll never come out!!"
he said, angrily.
"Is that the small problem?" asked Zoontok.
Goober-poof shook his head.
"No, that's the huge problem. The SMALL problem is
much bigger!" he corrected.
"Well, out with it then," Zoontok asked.
"CAN I KILL HIM NOW?!"
"NO!!!" Zoontok yelled. "The small
problem, please?"
"Yes," said Dr. Goober-poof. "I was in my
room, mixing the DNA of a weasel and Elvis Peasley-"
"-Elvis Peasley?"
"NOW?!?"
"NO!!"
Goober-poof continued. "-When all of a sudden there
was this explosion and now I've created a monster that says it wants to get all
people named Uncle!"
"YOUR FIRST NAME IS UNCLE?!"
"YES!!!"
"We have to get you out of here, Uncle
Zoontok," said Dr. Goober-poof, "before what's here gets you!"
"Indeed. To the Sloth Mobile!!" Zoontok
bellowed. The three of them were about to run off to the other side of the
stage, but a new voice stopped them.
"Hey, baby, where ya goin'?"
"Oh, my goodness! He['s here!!" Dr.
Goober-poof flipped. That was when the Clumph ran onto the stage, club in hand,
but he did so with a pair of sunglasses.
He stopped before the trio and said, "You got that
right, honey." The audience cheered for the Clumph. In response, the
club-wielder spun around, stopped, faced the audience, knelt down, and pointed
with his teeth shining. "Thankyouverymuch," he uttered. The crowd
went crazy again. Then the Clumph stopped milking them and faced the trio
again. "Alright, Uncle, baby, you asked for it. A-huh-huh." The
Clumph raised his club into the air menacingly.
"HEY!! YOU SHTOLE MY SHTICK! I mean, you shtoled my
stick! I mean you sticked my mole! I mean, you stuck my mole up my-"
"SHUT UP, TIMBER!!" Zoontok yelled. He faced
the Clumph and started begging. "Oh, please-oh-please-oh-PLEASE don't kill
me! I have a wife and kid!!"
"Sorry, babe. A rule's a rule. Oh, yeah." The
Clumph twirled his weapon above his head a little more. Mr. Timber winced,
expecting the end. Then at last, the Clumph struck! WHACK!! He belted himself
in the forehead, shattering his sunglasses, developed a silly look on his face,
and fell backwards. He crashed onto the floor and the other three actors looked
at the fallen monster in amazement. They stared for a while longer, and then
the Clumph lifted up his head. "Don't cry for me," he said, "I'm
all clubbed up. Mm-hm-hm." He plopped back down onto the floor.
"Oh-oh. Yeah, yeah."
The three Goombas looked at eachother with much
befuddlement on their minds. "Well, I'll be bamboozled," said the
lumberjack.
"Ding-dong. The witch is dead," said Dr.
Goober-poof.
"This calls for a celebration!" Mr. Zoontok
announced. "We shall all go out for some tree-flavored ice cream!"
"Prodigious!" Dr. Goober-poof said.
"Delicious! I'll-" Mr. Timber stopped himself.
"Wait a minute. I thought you said you ate all the trees!!!"
"Oh," Zoontok said sheepishly. "I guess I
lied."
Timber's eyes burst wide open in fury. He raised his axe
and let out his battle cry. "RAAWWWGGGHHH!!!" he screamed.
"AAAUUUUGGGHHH!!" Zoontok wailed.
"NO, TIMBEEERRRR!!!" Dr. Goober-poof voiced.
Then the crazed lumberjack started chasing down the two family-members until
all three of them were off-stage, leaving the Clumph's downed body behind.
That was when the audience could hear the disembodied
voice of a far more interesting narrator. "And that, kiddies, is why you
must never spend the night on another planet. The End!"
Every contributing member of the audience hopped up and
down in pure excitement and pleasure. The show was a hit. The Clumph got back
onto his feet and the other three actors ran back onto the stage so the four of
them could line up and take a bow. The crowd cheered even harder. The talented
quartet took a few more bows letting the audience do their thing. Then finally,
the Goomba King, the REAL Goomba King, walked onto the stage. He stood before
the four actors and faced the audience. They all quieted down. Seeing that this
was his cue, the royal Goomba took it from there.
"Goomba Grove!" he said. "It is great to
be back." This sentence was what got the audience to start mumbling
amongst themselves in a confused manner. "You are not going to believe
what I am about to tell you," he continued, "but, for a while, I was
not the one ruling this town." The people of Goomba Grove started
muttering even louder. "I was impersonated! Framed! Thrown into my own
dungeon! The audience's murmurings grew even louder. "But now..." the
real king stated. The audience piped down once again. "I'm back. And it's
all thanks to these four brave individuals!"
The audience erupted into another rite of cheering. Mr.
Zoontok, Mr. Timber, Dr. Goober-poof, and the Clumph all took a bow.
"Ah, ah, ah! Not THOSE four people," the
Goomba King corrected. The audience started acting confused again. The four
actors stepped aside to let four more people walk on-stage: Shy Guy, Snifit,
Chak, and David. "THOSE four people!"
The audience went, "Oohhhhh!!" Then they went,
"YAAAYYYYYYY!!!" The town's four new heroes each were doing something
different. Chak was waving with two hands, David waved with only one, Shy Guy
was flexing his muscles, and Snifit had his hands folded behind his back,
modestly. Then the exciting narrator started talking again.
"That's right, folks! Goomba Grove is in the debt
of these four brave people! Presenting: Big Guy!!"
The people started cheering for the super muscular Shy
Guy. "Whoa. Big Guy??" he said to himself. "Hmm..."
"Laser Snifit!!" the narrator announced. The
crowd cheered for him, too.
"Laser Snifit?" he said. "What in the
name of..."
"Chogun!!" The audience gave it up for the bug
man.
"Chogun..." he mused. "That's
strange..."
"And Davey!!" The large gathering of Goombas
let their voices ring out for the little boy. He didn't look pleasured.
"Davey?!" he fumed. "Why? Why!?"
"And now for the award ceremony!!" the
narrator boomed. Everyone went ballistic over that, too.
"Award ceremony?" the renamed Snifit mumbled.
The Clumph walked up to the one the narrator referred to as Big Guy.
"Big Guy," he said, club in hand, "for
busting down everything that got in our way and for being such a great
inspiration for us all, I'd like to give you this club." The Clumph handed
over the massive object. The overgrown 8-Bit took it in an enthused mood. The
audienced vocally expressed its happiness as well.
"Whoa," he said, swinging the club at the air,
"Thanks a bunch!"
Next, it was time for the one called Laser Snifit to get
his gift. Dr. Goober-poof approached him. "Laser Snifit," he said,
taking off his lab-coat, "for fending off all the fiendish minions of the
one who framed our king, I'd like you to have this lab-coat." The grey
laser-shooter took it from the Goomba with a strange look on his face.
"Um, thanks," he said. He slipped the garment
on. The audience cheered for him again.
The one called Chogun was going next. He was approached
by Mr. Timber. "Courageous Mr. Chogun," said the lumberjack,
"For getting rid of the fake Goomba King once and for all, I'd like you to
have this axe." The bug-like person received a shiny, new weapon in
placement of the one that shattered. It was admired.
"Much obliged, friend!" said the axe's new
wielder. The crowd's cheering continued. Last but not least, it was the child's
turn. He had the intergalactic Mr. Zoontok walk up to him.
"Davey, my boy," he said. The fourth and final
awarded one frowned. "For recognizing our plight and gallantly shooting
those who opposed you in your struggle for our town, I'd like you to have this
laser pistol." The boy's frown vanished and became replaced by a wide-eyed
face. He took it gratefully and with much disbelief.
"Thank you," said the former-man. "Thank
you, sir."
"No problem, son," Mr. Timber responded. The
audience cheered even more. The narrator got to talking again.
"And that, folks, is a wrap!" he said.
"Just remember: Always Reduce, Reuse, and Floss!" The crowd went wild
one last time. Some time after that, the narrator topped it off. "Thank
you... and good night!" The curtain closed up on the stage, covering all
nine of the people that were up there. Feeling in significantly higher spirits,
the audience walked away happy.
"Daddy, dat pway was fuuuunnyyyy!"
"I know, Junior, I know..."
Behind the curtains, a certain nine-some was busy
discussing some unfinished business. "So you're leaving?" the Goomba
King said.
"Yup! The night is young and the road's calling my
name. It's saying, 'Big Guy! Big Guy! Come to me! You've got a journey to
continue!'" The huge man shrugged his shoulders. "It's just one of
those things."
"I understand," said the Goomba King. "I
would just like to thank you for saving our town one last time, and wish you
good luck on your journey."
The muscle-man nodded and gave a thumbs-up to the
monarch. His next move was to look at the four actors. "Well, we'll be
seeing you," he said. "And thanks for the gifts! They rock!"
"Um, yeah. They really do," said the
lab-coat-wearing Snifit.
The actors all nodded and waved some. "Y'all come
back now, y'hear?" said the Clumph in another completely different voice.
The traveling quartet's huge leader looked at the Clumph
disbelievingly. "Creepy," he said. Then he turned around while his
other teammates were busy waving back. "Anyways... Bye now!" The five
people representing Goomba Grove returned some farewells, and the enormous
8-Bit's three partymembers turned around as well so they could follow their
leader off the stage. Soon, the popsicle-stand had been blown, and the
journeying four-some was back beneath the starlit sky.
"Well, Laser Snifit, Chogun, Davey," said the
bodybuilder, "gotta move on..." Two of the people he said this two
nodded, but the other one shook his head in disgust by his new name. After
walking down more roads and between more houses, Goomba Grove was behind them,
and more trees awaited them...
An unseen person' voice called me Davey, and a space
alien gave me a laser pistol... I hope no real space aliens are out there...
Elsewhere, a certain Goomba could hear children and
adults alike laughing, music being played, and bottles of champagne being
popped. Goomba Grove had definitely been restored to its original luster...
"Goooodiieeeee..." he moaned. "Goooomba
Groooove is back to noooormallll..."
♠♣♥♦
Yoshi and Glishy
found themselves standing between some exotic jungle trees and in the presence
of a stream of lava. This boiling hot, liquid fire was oozing its way out a
gigantic volcanoe. Yoshi looked at it, impressed.
"This is Mt. Lava Lava," Glishy explained.
"Noone is allowed to go in there. It's waaay too dangerous."
Yoshi nodded. He had learned all kinds of different
words and phrases thanks to this new interpretor. As he stared some more at
that flowing mass of flaming gunk, he put his thoughts into words inside his
head.
Once I learn how to, Yoshi mentally spoke, I'm
going to ask if there's a way off this island...
♠♣♥♦
"You said they were too broken to fight
back. You said there couldn't possibly be a rebellion. You said we were
overreacting by making those new weapons!!"
The Goomba that had impersonated that town's true ruler
was lying on the ground, covered in bruises, in the middle of the woods, being
lectured by a gang of Goombas in stupid costumes. The leader of which was the
one in a torn-up black tuxedo.
"Well, we've had it!!" said the fed-up Goomba.
"From now on, we're not gonna be listening to you. We're gonna go out
there and get some REAL jobs! So screw you and your petty little schemes!!
We're leaving..." The Goombas gave one last look at the false monarch,
turned around in anger, and trudged off. Now he was alone in the middle of
nowhere, all covered in marks he'd feel in the morning. This unlawful man had
gotten the lime-light and everything else stripped from him. His followers were
gone, his position was gone... Everything. All this dawned on him, mercilessly.
All this including the fact that not a single soul was nearby willing to give
him a shred of sympathy... almost.
"Humpty Dumpty conquered the town. Humpty Dumpty
was brought down! All of his horses, all of his men, refused to listen to him again.
Tragedy at its finest..."
The imposter Goomba King picked his head up off the
ground and saw two black figures standing behind him. One of them had a
unibrow, and the other one just looked angry.
"Who are..." the fake king tried to say, but
he was too beaten to finish. The one with the unibrow shuffled up to the
Goomba.
"The name's Razule. Not MR. Razule, not MASTER
Razule, just Razule, even though, technically, I'm your new master!"
"WHAT?!" the impersonator spat. "What are
you talking about?! Nobody's my master!!"
"That's what he said." Razule gestured to the
person behind him. He was scowling.
"Razule is insane," he said, "but he's
the only person that will help me."
"That's Ren for ya!" Razule giggled.
"Well now, friend, go on. Who are you supposed to be?"
"I used to be the Goomba King," the downed one
grumbled, "but now I'm just a Goomba Prince."
"Okay, Princy!" Razule exclaimed. He shuffled
even closer to the Goomba and helped him back on his feet. Once he was sure the
beat-up one could stand on his own, the insane one stepped back to look at the
two former-tyrants. "The three of us?" he said. "We're three of
a kind. We all used to have it all. Fame. Fortune. Chocolate-covered
vanities!"
"What?!" said the impersonator.
"He talks like this all the time. Better get used
to it," Ren advised.
"But it all got taken away from us. Teddy bears.
Teddy bears with mallets and unfriendly thinking caps! They came for us. They
wanted to get us. They were jealous. They couldn't handle us being the shining
stars on their flourescent ponies. No, they couldn't, no, they couldn't. So
they knocked us down and made us eat dirt!!" Razule explained. Even though
his words sounded like nonsense, the one he called Princy seemed to understand
what he was saying. "It isn't fair," he continued. "IT ISN'T
FAIR!! All those pens... All those whoopee-cushions... Gone. Down the drain.
Bye-bye!" Razule acted like he was crying. He sniffled a little, but only
got weird looks in return, especially from the Goomba. Then the Raven-like
creature brightened up. "No more," he declared. "NO MORE!!! We
must revolt against these teddy bears. We must strike back! We must take animal
balloons, and whack them against their gravy-boats!! We must WIN THE TIE-DYE
CUP!! Only then will we get the mustard we deserve..."
The Goomba was beginning to catch on. He looked at the
strange creature quizzically and made a question escape his lips. "And...
how are we to obtain this mustard?"
Razule gave the questioning one a very serious look. He
slowly shuffled up to him until he was extremely close. This made the Goomba
very uncomfortable. Without blinking, Razule answered. "One man, one
woman," said the creature. "A block-breaker and a block-maker. A
mustache and a maiden. A wretch and a witch." Razule finished listing.
"They have it. The key! They have it!" Razule finally stepped away
from the Goomba and allowed him some breathing space. "We must get this
key... AND HAVE OUR REVENGE!!" The Goomba was very confused by this. Razule
suddenly started shuffling off very quickly, leaving Ren and the Goomba Prince
behind. "COME, MY BRETHREN!! THE BATTLE AWAITS!!" Razule disappeared.
Ren soon began to follow. He stopped to look at their new enlistment.
"Believe it or not, he knows what he's talking
about," Ren said. The new guy was still skeptical. "Come on."
Ren started running after Razule again. The Goomba was left behind. He stood
watching these two black creatures scurry off into the woods. He looked behind
himself where his old followers had marched off to. This was also where Goomba
Grove was. Gradually, he began to accept that that wasn't his place anymore and
that he had to move on. It probably wasn't even his to begin with. Thinking
that insane people willing to help him might turn out better than the sane
people that left him did, he shook his head, and started hobbling after this
strange, new duo. Exactly what these three were up to was anyone's guess...
♠♣♥♦
Children in the streets were chasing after fireflies.
Some of their parents were calling them inside. This, Xoshi noticed as he
walked with White Rose up to a gate composed of two big blue rectangles with a
large, yellow star in the center. The two of them stopped. White Rose addressed
the brown Yo'ster.
"Beyond is the grand castle," he said.
"Beyond that is Shooting Star Summit. Once we get there, you promise all
will be revealed?"
Xoshi thought hard. Not wanting to hesitate too much, he
finally responded. "Promise," he said.
"Alright, then," said the knight. He faced the
doors again. "Let's get moving..." He pushed his way in, and Xoshi
followed. Soon, they were in the presence of the castle of the Mushroom
Kingdom. It was glorious, colossal, fanciful, and looked as though it came
straight from a faerie-tale. Guarding its front-doors were two Toads in uniform
with spears. Xoshi took this in as the two of him and his companion walked past
the gigantic building and around a flowing fountain of water. At some point,
they came across another spear-wielding Toad and stopped.
"Going to Shooting Star Summit?" he asked.
"Yes," White Rose replied.
"Watch yourself. They say a creature called the
Plantern Ghost is on the loose. I'd be cautious if I were you."
"Thank you, sir," White Rose said. The
comments were over and the duo could return to their journey.
They continued walking down a very peculiar road. As the
huge castle drifted further behind them, more and more stars continued to fade
into the sky. Some of them were even shooting. He looked at the ground and
noticed that the ground was getting more purple-colored. In the distance, he
could see an enormous hill. An enormous hill covered in dazzling sparkles.
This is it, Xoshi thought to himself. We
finally made it... Ugh... I've got butterflies...
Totally unsure of what exactly was next on their agenda,
Xoshi gathered his wits and walked on. It was only a matter of time until all
of this came together...